Archives for May 2013

9 Lies to Unlearn Before it’s Too Late

05.30.2013 by Marc Chernoff // 61 Comments

9 Lies to Unlearn Before it’s Too Late

The worst lies are the ones you tell yourself over and over again – the ones you live by. Perhaps someone close to you ingrained these lies in your mind, perhaps you were influenced by the negativity of popular media channels, or perhaps they grew from simple, innocent misunderstandings.

Either way, next time you decide to learn something new for the sake of self-improvement, start by unlearning a lie that has been deceiving you. Here are nine lies I have unlearned in my own life:

1. Happiness is about getting what you want.

There are two ways people try to find happiness. One is to continue to accumulate more and more of what they think they want. The other is to appreciate what they already have. The latter is the right path. Happiness isn’t about getting what you want; it’s about wanting what you’ve got. Happiness is not a goal, it’s a by-product of living well in each moment.

To be happy doesn’t mean you don’t desire more, it simply means you’re thankful for what you have and patient for what’s yet to come. Sometimes it’s easy to get so caught up in trying to accomplish something big, that you fail to notice the little things that give life its magic. So appreciate today for all it’s worth. Today is one of the good old days you’re going to miss in the years ahead.

2. Success looks a certain way.

You are not in this world to live up to everyone else’s expectations, nor should you feel that everyone else is here to live up to yours. You’ve got to pave your [Read more…]

7 Things You Need to Stop Doing Every Day

05.28.2013 by Marc Chernoff // 65 Comments

7 Things You Should Stop Doing Every Day

If you get decent value from making TO-DO lists, you’ll also get significant returns – in productivity, in improved relationships, in financial stability, and in heightened levels of happiness – from adding certain things to a TO-DON’T list.

As you may have guessed, a TO-DON’T list’ is a list of things not to do. It might seem a bit amusing, but it’s an incredibly useful tool for keeping track of unproductive habits like these:

1. Worrying about the wrong people.

The ladies of The Real Housewives of Orange County, they’ll survive without you. The family members and friends of Duck Dynasty, they won’t notice your absence if you stop watching their show. Even the private lives of your elected politicians and local public figures mean nothing in the grand scheme of your own life.

But your significant other, your friends, your children, your siblings, extended family members, business partners, employees and customers – these are the people who truly matter to you. Give them your time and attention. They’re the ones who deserve it.

And as you meet new individuals, be polite, but don’t try to be best friends with everyone. Take things slow and remain focused on your core people – the individuals whose absence would immediately make your life less fulfilling.

2. Focusing all your attention on future events instead of present moments.

This moment will never happen again. Look around. Cherish your time as you’re living it. Work towards something, but enjoy the journey of getting from here to there. Experience each step. Don’t succumb to a vicious cycle of overbearing productivity that forces you to constantly think about every imaginable time and place except right here, right now. [Read more…]

26 Steps to Living a Life You Love

05.26.2013 by Angel Chernoff // 43 Comments

26 Steps to the Life You Dream About

by Barrie Davenport

Have you dreamed of doing something big with your life? Are you longing to find your passion — something that makes you come alive? We all want to live a passionate, purposeful life, but most people have no idea how to go about doing that. How do you know what your passion is or if you’ve chosen the right path? How do you recreate the life you have now to build the amazing life you want to have? There are so many considerations, decisions and potential roadblocks.

However, finding and living your life passion is one of the most important endeavors you will ever undertake. Once you are living your passion, the quality of your life will improve dramatically. When you are doing something you love — something you feel deeply engaged in — everything feels easier and more joyful.

There is a process to uncovering your passion and living your passion. It isn’t hard, but it does take commitment, patience, and tenacity. There are many practical considerations in addition to the research and experimentation required in figuring out exactly what is the best fit for you.

But don’t be disheartened, because it is so worth it. And once you make the decision to work toward your passion, you’ll find the daily actions you take to get there offer so much satisfaction on their own. When you know a great outcome is ahead, the work to reach that outcome doesn’t really feel like work.

Let’s look at some of the actions you can take to get the ball rolling.

Preparation

1. Write a vision. Write down exactly what you want your life to look like at the end of this process, in every area of your life. Post the vision where you can see it every day. You can revise it along the way if you want.

2. Examine your current life. You’ve been focused on what you don’t like about your life, but examine your current life to see how much of it matches your vision. You want to maintain those things and remember that part of your vision is already happening. [Read more…]

9 Things Happy People Do to Stress Less

05.23.2013 by Angel Chernoff // 51 Comments

9 Tricks Happy People Use to Stress Less

People’s lives become chaotic the minute they decide to be.

People’s lives become happier the minute they decide to be.

Be the latter. For fast-acting stress relief, slow down and consider the following:

1. Know what you’re trying to achieve and why.

Lack of direction creates stress. And it’s lack of direction, not lack of time, that’s the problem when it comes to personal achievement. Everyone has the same 24-hour days and 7-day weeks.

Whenever you want to achieve something keep your conscious clear. Focus and make sure you know exactly what it is you want and why. No one can hit their target if they don’t know what their target is.

2. Do less by focusing exclusively on what’s important.

The essence of personal productivity is to do the important things rather than the urgent things. [Read more…]

4 Short Stories that Will Change the Way You Think

05.21.2013 by Marc Chernoff // 98 Comments

4 Short Stories that Will Change the Way You Think

“There’s always room for a story that can
transport people to another place.”
?J.K. Rowling

Let me distract you for a moment and tell you four short stories.

These are old stories – familiar stories. The people and the circumstances differ slightly for everyone who tells them, but the core lessons remain the same.

I hope the twist we’ve put on them here inspires you to think differently…

Story #1: All the Difference in The World

Every Sunday morning I take a light jog around a park near my home. There’s a lake located in one corner of the park. Each time I jog by this lake, I see the same elderly woman sitting at the water’s edge with a small metal cage sitting beside her.

This past Sunday my curiosity got the best of me, so I stopped jogging and walked over to her. As I got closer, I realized that the metal cage was in fact a small trap. There were three turtles, unharmed, slowly walking around the base of the trap. She had a fourth turtle in her lap that she was carefully scrubbing with a spongy brush.

“Hello,” I said. “I see you here every Sunday morning. If you don’t mind my nosiness, I’d love to know what you’re doing with these turtles.”

She smiled. “I’m cleaning off their shells,” she replied. “Anything on a turtle’s shell, like algae or scum, reduces the turtle’s ability to absorb heat and impedes its ability to swim. It can also corrode and weaken the shell over time.”

“Wow! That’s really nice of you!” I exclaimed. [Read more…]