Archives for August 2013

8 Things Unhappy People Refuse to Admit

08.29.2013 by Marc Chernoff // 100 Comments

8 Things Unhappy People Refuse to Admit

“People are just as happy as they make up their minds to be.”
?Abraham Lincoln

Everyone experiences an unhappy mood on occasion, but there is a big difference between experiencing a temporary bout of unhappiness and living a habitually unhappy life. That’s what chronically unhappy people do. And although many of these people are afraid to admit it, a vast majority of their unhappiness stems from their own beliefs and behaviors.

Over the years, Angel and I have helped thousands of unhappy people rediscover their smiles, and, in the process, we’ve learned a lot about the negative beliefs and behaviors that typically hold them back. Even if you are generally a happy person, take a look at the list below. Many of the unhappy people we’ve worked with initially refused to admit that they carried these beliefs and behaviors, even when the evidence stacked against them was undeniable. See if any of these points are keeping you from experiencing greater amounts of joy.

1. They struggle with self-respect.

Decide this minute to never again beg anyone for the love, respect, and attention that you should be showing yourself. Be your own best friend. Trust your inner spirit and follow your instincts. Accept who you are completely, the good and the bad, and make changes in your life as YOU see fit – not because you think anyone else wants you to be different, but because you know it’s the right thing to do, for YOU.

Be the person you will be happy to live with for the duration of your life. Don’t rely on your significant other, or anyone else, for your happiness and self-worth. Know that our first and last love is always self-love, and that if you can’t love and [Read more…]

6 Powerful Truths to Start Telling Yourself

08.27.2013 by Angel Chernoff // 54 Comments

6 Powerful Truths to Start Telling Yourself

by Therese Schwenkler

“Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius and it’s better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring.”
?Marilyn Monroe

YOU, my friend, are undeniably, unquestionably, extraordinarily amazing and powerful!

Have you forgotten this already?

In case you’re stuck in a moment of temporary confusion, allow me to remind you of some truths you need to start telling yourself more often…

1. “I do not have to settle.”

Oh, how I love your fierceness, your undying drive, the sheer wildcat intensity with which you slink through the jungle like a creature of passion – a passion that lights you up and that rises from the center of your calmest, deepest, most grounded self.

I so love it how you refuse to settle – for less than your best, for less than you deserve, for less than what it is you were made to be and to have and to do.

You won’t settle for the work that makes you a living, without also balancing in a life that’s worth living. You won’t settle for [Read more…]

9 Things You Will Regret Not Doing Sooner

08.25.2013 by Marc Chernoff // 59 Comments

9 Things You Will Regret Not Doing Sooner

“People always say life is too short for regrets.
But the truth is, it’s too long.”
?Sarah Addison Allen

One of the most difficult things to deal with in life is regret. Sometimes something will happen, and you will respond in the wrong way, and for a while thereafter you will wish you had done it differently. But eventually, you accept the experience as a lesson learned and you move on with your life.

This is hardly the worst kind of regret. What could be worse?

The chances you didn’t take. The relationships you were afraid to nurture. The decisions you waited too long to make. The things you didn’t even try when you had the chance. Those important words you left unspoken and deeds you left undone.

The good news is, it’s not too late. You are here breathing, which means you still have a chance to do what you might have done, and be what you might have been. Right now you have an opportunity to write yourself a future free of regret.

So take this opportunity and…

1. Take the first step.

The greatest miracle of your success in life will not be that you finished, it will be that you had the courage to begin.

The feeling you get from taking the first step is far better than the feeling you get from sitting around thinking about it. Get up and get moving. Take the first step today – just one small step forward on that goal you’ve been meaning to work on.

Even if you don’t feel 100% prepared right now, your worst try will always be 100% more effective than the person who never did. It is so easy to get caught [Read more…]

10 Ways Happy People Prioritize Their To-Do Lists

08.21.2013 by Marc Chernoff // 47 Comments

10 Ways Happy People Prioritize Their To-Do Lists

“What can I start doing today to make my life happier and more fulfilling?”

This is one of the most common questions readers ask us via email, blog comments, and social media. So today I want to share some simple, actionable ways to improve your happiness and wellbeing on a daily basis.

In the seven years of this blog’s existence, Angel and I have had the pleasure of meeting, coaching and interacting with hundreds of truly inspiring, happy, prolific people. And the more we have interacted with people like this, the more we realize the similarities in how they prioritize their lives, and how their priorities align with our own.

What becomes evident is that, to sustain happiness, we must focus our attention on the right things, in the right ways. Every growing human being (that means all of us) has resource constraints: limited time and energy. It is critical that we spend our resources effectively.

Here are 10 ways to prioritize your life and your to-do lists for increased happiness and fulfillment:

1. One thing at a time, with full presence.

In other words, make the thing you have chosen to do the number one priority while you’re doing it. Focus with your full attention. See the value in where you are, while you’re there. Enjoy what’s happening, while it’s happening.

In the end, you will come to realize that the best days are the days when you don’t need anything extreme or special to happen to make you smile. You simply appreciate the moments and feel gratitude, seeking nothing else, nothing more. That is what true happiness is all about.

2. Family and close friends are at the top.

Nurture your important relationships in such a way that when you tell the people you care about that you care about them, you’re simply reinforcing what they [Read more…]

7 Questions You Are Too Scared to Ask

08.18.2013 by Marc Chernoff // 49 Comments

7 Questions We Are All Scared to Ask

It’s not about finding the right answers;
it’s about asking the right questions.

Angel and I often forget to ask the right questions. We get so caught up in what we’re doing that we lose track where we’re going. We settle into comfortable routines, instead of confronting the challenges our dreams demand. Then, eventually, we lift our heads to the realization that the environment we’ve settled into leads to the answers to someone else’s dream.

And that’s when we catch ourselves – time to take a break, regroup, and ask ourselves the scary questions we’ve been avoiding.

1. Based on my daily routines and actions, where can I expect to be in five years?

This is your life story and you are the only author. If you’re feeling like you’ve been stuck in the same setting for too long, it’s time to start writing a new chapter of your life. The plot structure is simple: Doing nothing gets you nothing. Doing the wrong things gets you the wrong things. Doing the same things gets you the same things. Your story only changes when you make changes.

If you have an idea about what you want the next chapter of your life to look like, you have to DO things that support this idea. An idea, after all, isn’t going to do anything for you until you do something productive with it. In fact, as long as that great idea is just sitting around in your head it’s probably doing far more harm than good.

Your subconscious mind knows you’re procrastinating on something that’s important to you. The necessary work that you keep [Read more…]