Archives for October 2016

One Reality You Must Accept Before You Can Live Your Best Life

10.30.2016 by Marc Chernoff // 37 Comments

One Reality You Must Accept Before You Can Live Your Best Life

I woke up this morning to a sunrise of astonishing beauty, so I walked out the front door to experience it. And as I stood in the yard gazing up at the pink, orange and blue sky, my heart sung and ached at the same time.

Instinctively, I wanted to share this breathtaking moment with Angel and Mac, but they were still asleep, and that troubled me. I felt a bit down and incomplete, without being able to share this special moment with them, or with anyone. The most beautiful sunrise I’d ever seen was slipping through my fingers.

I considered running into the house to grab a camera so I could at least show Angel and Mac a photo of the moment that they missed, but I caught myself and took a deep breath.

I then acknowledged that there was something else I needed to do instead: I needed to [Read more…]

7 Qualities of a Conscious, Loving Relationship

10.19.2016 by Marc Chernoff // 26 Comments

7 Qualities of a Conscious, Loving Relationship

Over the past decade, between the two of us, Angel and I have read hundreds of books on relationships, coached hundreds of students who were struggling to find happiness in their relationships, and interacted with over 100,000 blog subscribers (subscribe here) who continue to ask us questions and tell us stories on a daily basis about their relationships.

All of this has given us keen insight into the behaviors and habits that make relationships work well in the long run. In our course and coaching, and at our live events, Angel and I often refer to these as the “qualities of conscious, loving relationships.”

So what exactly is a conscious, loving relationship?

It’s a relationship, intimate or platonic, in which…

1. Both people are emotionally self-reliant.

If your happiness is dependent on the constant validation and approval you receive from someone else, then you are giving away far too much of your power. It’s human nature to want to be liked and admired, to want to be included, but it’s damaging to your self-esteem and emotional strength if it’s something you have to constantly fight for.

The key is to [Read more…]

4 Toxic Behaviors that Tear Relationships Apart

10.16.2016 by Angel Chernoff // 22 Comments

4 Toxic Behaviors that Tear Relationships Apart

Over the years, through our coaching practice, Getting Back to Happy course, and live events, Marc and I have worked with thousands of individuals and couples looking to fix their failing relationships, and we’ve learned a lot about what it takes to make this happen.

Whether you’re working to fix your marriage, a dating relationship, or a friendship, there are lots of little things you can do to keep your relationship on track. And since we’ve recently covered many of these healthy relationship strategies on our blog, today we’re going to take a quick look at the flip-side – the most common toxic behaviors that tear relationships apart.

Truth be told, most failing and failed relationships suffer from the same four basic behavioral issues… [Read more…]

16 Hard Truths About Our Relationships No One Wants to Admit

10.12.2016 by Marc Chernoff // 41 Comments

16 Hard Truths About Our Relationships We Don't Want to Admit

We all long for authentic relationships, but, even in our overly connected lives, these relationships are hard to find.

We meet people and socialize online, but these connections tend to lack a necessary dose of human intimacy. We work beside people in crowed office buildings, but our communication is work-oriented and not relationship-oriented. We may be lucky enough to have friends and family in our lives, but when we are distracted by social media and busy with work, those relationships take a hit.

So what does it take to create and nurture an authentic relationship? That’s a question Angel and I help our students answer on daily basis. After a decade of coaching individuals and couples, and researching how people build authentic relationships, we’ve learned a lot about what it takes, and we’ve also learned a lot about the mistakes people make in the process. It’s a subset of the latter – the mistakes – that I want to touch on today.

One of the biggest mistakes we make in our relationships is denying the truth. We deny the truth about [Read more…]

5 Ways to Spark Your Motivation (When You’re Feeling Stuck)

10.10.2016 by Angel Chernoff // 16 Comments

5 Ways to Spark Your Motivation When You’re Feeling Stuck
by Jonathan Fields, author of How to Live a Good Life

Use disappointment and frustration to motivate you rather than derail you. Be mindful. You are in control of the way you respond to life.

It’s one of life’s greatest frustrations.

You know, deep down, you’re capable of so much more. You feel this wellspring of potential inside of you, burning to get out, yet you can’t figure out how to tap into it.

You’d love to step away from a place of feeling stuck, to moving through each day feeling like you’re contributing on the highest possible level. Like you’re tapping every molecule of capability and you’re progressing through life completely and utterly lit-up.

I call this state being sparked, and I’ve spent years researching what it takes to live in this place. What I’ve discovered may surprise you too. For example, it’s not about finding that “one thing” you’re completely head-over-heels passionate about, because for many of us there is no singular thing. And, if there is for you, you’re typically unable to identify it until you’ve accumulated enough life experience through trial and error to know what it is.

But, you don’t have to wait decades, years or even months to feel like you’re lit-up, awash in the fullest expression of your potential. All you need to do is [Read more…]