You have come a long way, and you’re still learning and growing. Be thankful for the lessons. Take them and make the best of things today.

For my 18th birthday, many moons ago, my grandfather on my mom’s side gave me four lightly-used flannel shirts that he no longer needed. The shirts were barely worn and in great shape; my grandfather said he thought they would look great on me. Unfortunately, I thought they were odd gifts at the time and I wasn’t thankful. I looked at him skeptically, gave him a crooked half-smile, and moved on to the other gifts sitting in front of me. My grandfather died two days later from a sudden heart attack. The flannel shirts were the last gifts he ever gave me, and that crooked half-smile was the last time I directly acknowledged him. Today, I still regret the little thing I didn’t say when I had the chance: “Thank you Grandpa. I appreciate you.”

That was a huge wake-up call for me — one that has served me well for over two decades now.

And here are eight wake-up calls for you to reflect on today — some important lessons worth learning and living by, before it’s too late: (more…)

“Do not ruin today with mourning tomorrow.”
— Catherynne M. Valente

Ever feel a little overwhelmed? Or really overwhelmed?

This quick read is for YOU…

Once upon a time there was a man who had been lost in the desert for three whole days without water. Just as he was about to collapse, he saw what appeared to be a lake a few hundred yards in front of him. “Could it be? Or is it just a mirage?” he thought to himself.

With the last bit of strength he could muster, he staggered toward the lake and quickly learned that his prayers had been answered: it was no mirage — it was (more…)

It happens to all of us gradually as we live and grow. We discover more about who we are and the way life is, and then we realize there are some changes we need to make. The lifestyle we’ve been living no longer fits. The environments and relationships we once found comfort in no longer exist, or no longer serve our best interests. So we cherish all the great memories, but find ourselves at a crossroads in life, moving forward.

And it’s not easy. It’s painful to give up what’s comfortable and familiar, especially when there’s no other choice. Marc and I have struggled through this process many times out of necessity. Over the past 15 years we’ve had to deal with several significant, unexpected life changes and challenges, including: (more…)

“Head up, heart open. To better days!”
— T.F. Hodge

Struggling to find your motivation? Feeling unsure or uneasy about the next steps?

There are just a few things you need to know right now.

This quick read is for YOU…

Once upon a time there was a woman in her mid-sixties who noticed that she had lived her entire life in the same small town. And although she had spent decades enthusiastically dreaming about traveling and seeing the world, she had never taken a single step to make this dream a reality.

Finally, she woke up on the morning of her 65th birthday and decided that now was the time! She sold all of her possessions except for some essential items she needed, packed these items into a backpack, and (more…)

Patience isn’t about waiting; it’s the ability to keep a good attitude while working hard for what you believe in.

As you move through the days and weeks ahead, remind yourself that it takes roughly 66 days to form a habit on average. So for the next nine and a half weeks, consciously leverage the actionable reminders below to look at the brighter side of your life, and you will gradually rewire your brain.

1. Start steadying yourself with simple rituals.

When life feels like an emotional roller coaster, steady yourself with simple rituals. Make the bed. Water the plants. Rinse off your own bowl and spoon. Simplicity attracts calmness and wisdom.

2. Start filtering out the noise in your life.

Be careful about who you give the microphone and stage to in your life. Don’t just listen to the loudest voice every day. Listen to the (more…)

“What day is it?” asked Pooh.
“It’s today,” squeaked Piglet.
“My favorite day,” said Pooh.

When you first awake, be mindful and take a second to think about what a privilege it is to simply be alive and relatively healthy. Breathe onto the bathroom mirror just to see how amazing your breath looks. The moment you start acting like life is a blessing, I assure you it will start to feel like one. And when you start the day in a mindful state like this, it’s easier to focus more effectively on what matters most.

If you’d like to practice starting your mornings more mindfully in the weeks ahead, below you will find 52 good morning quotes. I choose one of these quotes every (more…)

Asking the right questions is often the answer.

In a recent email newsletter I wrote, “Calm your mind today. Don’t just think outside the box; think like there is no box.”

And to my surprise, 97 people quoted that line and responded with the same general question: “How?”

I’ve spent the morning thinking about how to answer their collective question in the most universal way possible, and I’ve decided that the simplest explanation I can give is this: Ask yourself better questions — questions that (more…)

It’s not what you say to everyone else that determines your life; it’s what you whisper to yourself that has the greatest power.

The best lessons we learn in life are the lessons we learn over and over again. The human mind needs lots of reminders — lots of practice — to operate effectively. For example, deep down we know it’s OK to…

• Say “no”
• Speak up
• Tell the truth
• Believe differently
• Change our mind
• Prioritize our needs
• Learn from our mistakes
• Embrace our imperfections
• Forgive and seek forgiveness
• Begin again, with grace and gratitude

Yet, we often (more…)

We don’t even realize how often we’re blocking our own present blessings by holding on so tightly.

Letting go is not giving up. Letting go is surrendering any needless attachments to particular outcomes and situations. Surrender means showing up in your life with the intention to be your best, and to do the best you know how, without expecting life to be ideal. Have goals, have dreams, take purposeful action, and build solid relationships, but detach from what life must look like every step of the way.

The energy of someone aspiring to create something wonderful this year, teamed with a healthy balance of surrender, is far more effective than someone determined to create outcomes with a desperate must-have mentality. Surrender brings inner calmness, awareness, and understanding. And lest we forget that our outer lives are a reflection of our inner state of being.

Thus, take a moment to remind yourself of some things many of us typically attach to long after it’s time to let go, so you can loosen your grip on them as you move forward… (more…)

“One day you will look back and see that all along you were blooming.”
— MHN

Twenty-eight years ago, when I was a freshman in high school, my English teacher gave my class a homework assignment entitled, “Advice for a Younger Generation.” The concept of the assignment was simple: Each student had to interview a person who was over the age of 25, gather enough information to write a basic biography of their life and find out what their top tips are for a younger generation. I chose to interview my dad. He was (more…)

You can’t calm the storm. What you can do is calm yourself, and the storm will gradually pass. So do your best to breathe when negativity surrounds you. Let calmness be your superpower. The ability to not overreact or take things too personally keeps your mind clear and your heart at peace, which ultimately gives you the upper hand.

Also, remind yourself that people are hard to be around when they believe everything happening around them is a direct assault on them, or is in some way all about them. Don’t fall into this trap. What people say and do is much more about (more…)

Where you ultimately end up greatly depends on your daily attitude and response.

This morning one of our clients, Monica — a sufferer of a fairly recent and debilitating car accident — was smiling from ear to ear the minute our FaceTime coaching session began. “What has you in such good spirits today?” I asked her. “I’m thinking better about things today — about how lucky I am to be alive,” she replied. “I thought the injuries I sustained in that accident earlier this year signified the end of life as I know it, but now I realize they signify the beginning.”

All details aside, Monica decided to begin again, in her mind first and then in her life. It’s taken her several months of healing and practice, but she has gradually let go of the “shoulda, woulda, coulda” attachments in her head about her circumstances. And she has stepped forward with grace, determination, and a healthy mindset.

Let’s follow Monica’s lead and practice thinking better starting today, so we can begin to build momentum as we move forward through the rest of May, and beyond… (more…)

It takes roughly 66 days to form a habit. So for 9 weeks look at the bright side of your life, and you will rewire your brain.

If the grass looks greener on the other side…

Stop staring.

Stop comparing.

Stop complaining.

And START watering the grass you’re standing on…

Truly, the most powerful weapon against stress on the average day is our ability to choose one thought or response over another. I was reminded of this today when a reader named Sarah sent me the following in an email (I’m sharing this with permission): (more…)

The truth does not cease to exist when it’s forgotten.

You know how you can hear or read something several times in various ways before it finally sinks in? The truths listed below fall firmly into that category — timeless lessons that many of us probably learned years ago, and have been reminded of ever since, yet for whatever reason we tend to forget in the heat of the moment.

This, my friends, is my attempt at helping all of us, myself included, “get it” and “remember it” once and for all…

1. Life is relatively short and nothing is guaranteed.

We know deep down that life is short, and that death will happen to all of us eventually, and yet we are infinitely surprised when it happens to (more…)

“The world is full of struggle. It is also full of overcoming.”

Character and wisdom are both sculpted over time. These qualities come with loss, lessons, and triumphs. They come after doubts, second guesses, and exploring unknowns. If there was a definitive path to personal growth, everyone would be on it. Truth be told, the seeds of your success are often planted in your past failures, and some of your best stories will likely come from overcoming your greatest struggles.

Marc and I learned all of that the hard way. Over the past fifteen years we have dealt with several significant hardships, including the sudden death of (more…)

The goal is to change your response to what you can’t control — to gradually grow stronger on the inside, so less on the outside affects your inner wellness without your conscious permission.

The mind is the biggest battleground. It’s the place where the greatest conflict resides. It’s where we develop daily habits that put us in direct opposition with reality, where over half the things we fear…never actually happen. It’s where our expectations get the best of us and we fall victim to our own trains of thought, again and again.

Truth be told, in the game of life we all receive a unique set of unexpected limitations and variables in the field of play. The question is: How will you (more…)

“You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.”
— Mae West

Twenty years ago, I was lucky enough to witness the humble, elegant, peaceful passing of my 89-year-old grandfather. As I sat quietly in his hospice room alongside my grandma and other family members, his nurse smiled softly and said, “I can see he lived well. People his age often pass just the way they lived.”

And as I drove home that evening a couple questions kept cycling through my mind…

“Am I living well?”

“What do I want to be able to smile about on the inside when I’m on my deathbed?”

These questions are tough, especially the second one. At the time, I desperately struggled to envision myself on my deathbed — just thinking about it stressed me out. So I simply avoided the question and the soul searching it demanded of me. I distracted myself for a few more years until I found myself back in a hospice room with my 90-year-old grandma (who was the most amazing human being I’ve ever met, by the way).

On the final day of her life, (more…)

If somebody is working on themselves and changing for the better, it’s unnecessary to keep bringing up their past. People can change and grow. You know that’s true. But have you given yourself a fair chance to change and grow, too?

Have you consciously loosened your grip on what’s behind you, so you can step forward again with grace?

If you’re shaking your head, you aren’t alone. At times we all fall victim to our attachments. We simply don’t realize how often we block our own present blessings by holding on to the past.

Thus, it’s time for a quick true story about life and letting go…

When Our Old Stories Hold Us Back

She rarely makes eye contact. Instead, she looks down at the ground. Because the ground is safer. Because unlike people, it (more…)

As we look forward to everything 2024 has in store, I know many of us are yearning for a simpler and selective range of life experiences in the year ahead — the happier days, the normal times, the settings and experiences that make us feel more comfortable. And yet, the full range of reality often brings something very different. The year ahead will inevitably give us an extensive array of experiences that evoke feelings ranging from sadness to struggle to pride to growth to hope, and more.

So we have a choice starting today. We can revolt against reality — the reality of having to deal with discomfort, of having to cope with uncertainty, of having to feel upset sometimes. Or we can (more…)

Think a little less about managing your problems and a little more about managing your mindset.

Remind yourself that inner peace and progress are both built through tiny recurring victories. It’s the seemingly inconsequential choices we make day to day that either break us or make us whole in the long run. Yes, the fulfillment of our lives ultimately depends on the quality of our daily thoughts and actions.

So as we move toward (and through) the impending New Year, challenge yourself…

1. When a new day begins, challenge yourself to smile genuinely and gratefully.

2. When you don’t get what you want, challenge yourself to (more…)